Happy OR Sad??

today is quite complicated for me. yesterday i got try to date her n she did not gimme any accurate answer and i jz take it as a joke from her. today noon i received her msg to go for movie n i feeled vry happy coz is is imposible for it to happen again. although that time im eating with group of my friends, i just told them i got something urgent n need to leave.
At last after two week plus, i manage to date her out again! At last after two week plus, i can talk with her face to face! deep inside my heart i feel very happy.
BUT i can feel that something is difference. the way she treat me, the way she talk to me, all diffenrent from the past. i think it is all because that she already put down me. At the same time, i feel saddd deep inside my heart.
what happen to me? ahaha.. i also duno.
after going back home, i force myself to ask her all the question in my mind. i was hoping for a positive answer but ends up all negative answer was given to me. ahaha. reali feel very sad. Why am i so stupid? Stupid because i still think that i still got chance but in reality i do not have any chances!
I have been try to lie to myself that i dun miss her anymore. i thought that time can help me forget her slowly bt as time pass on i found that i miss her more n more! How come it will be like this?!!
IM STUPID ENOUGH FOR NOT APPRECIATE HER UNTIL THE TIME SHE GONE!!!
REALY HATE MYSELF A LOT!