Ponteng again~

28 July 2009 (Tuesday)

Actually today got class from 2pm -5pm. i enter the class around 2.10pm. BUT someone cheat me go out from the class and then started to drag me go out with him. He even do not allow me to go in to the class! WHO that someone? Sure is Ron la!! Luckily im not the only and first victim this time. The first victim this time is my ah jie, Chuee Leng! ahahaha! Laugh si me! She kena block by Ron before she manage to go in to the class. Both of us kena drag by Ron go sing k at Neway at OneU.

Ron

Chuee Leng

They 2 look like couple la~

Feel like im lamp post! ><

random shot~

I hate jc

ahaha. really duno y im so stupid. just few messages from her then i will start thinking that i still got chance. just because no one free to accompany her, then only she will find me. I know about all this but still i cant control myself from thinking that i still got chance. What the hell happen on me! I really hate myself so much now! Stop dreaming la! It is not gonna to happen that way for now n even in the future! People just thought you as a friend, for what u wanna treat her so good? I hope i know the answer! Do not ever let urself be hurt anymore! Can i do that? I really not sure about that... I got alot of things wanna share with her, but will she care? Maybe she will, but the type of care is just a normal caring from a normal friend! Why am i taking it so serious?
Because i am so so so stupid! Really hate myself so much!

1 Month~

Time passed so fast and it is already 1 month after that day.

Hmm alot of things have changed after that day until now, yet there is still something remain unchanged after so long. ahaha.. that is my so called "stupidity"! I also duno myself waiting for what everyday. Maybe i already used to it and waiting become part of my life for the past 1 month. Actually what am i waiting for since i know it is imposible for that to happen. Haiz. I really duno what am i waiting for and that is why i say myself stupid..

I feel quite relieve after knowing that her life was better than last time. Duno why i will feel like that. Maybe the time changing me slowly. Recently i do not like to stay alone, feel like want to escape from something so much. If there is anyone that call me to go out, for sure i will not turn them down cause i really do not want to stay alone. Maybe scare that myself will think too much again. But i know it is not a suitable way to do like that because it is imposible for me everyday everytime also got people available to hang out with me. Honestly, sometime i also do not know why and what am i doing. Something seriously wrong with me i think.

After study at HELP few months, now i decide to transfer to Sunway because of few reasons. Of course what i tell all my friends is 1 of the reason, but there are still some other reason for it. I just want to change to a new environment and start all over again. I know i should know do like that but other than that i do not know what else should i do. Of course i will miss all the new friends i know at HELP cause everyone of them treat me so nice! Just like last time i decide to transfer to HELP from UTAR, i also miss all my foundation friends so much. Until now i still miss the foundation life with u all! Seriously that foundation year was my happiest year until now. Miss the time with peizhi, yenyee, xiaorou, minyee, neo, huiboon, henry, rannie, whole TE2 and TE4. You all really gimme alots of good memories that year. And now im going to transfer again to Sunway if they accept me la~ , i also miss my new gang at HELP la. Although i have been with them for a short period but there are already alot good memories with them cause they really nice to me. Hope we can stay connected even if i really transfer to Sunway this August.

The time really pass so fast n now it is already 1 month. I also slowly get use to be alone already.
People! Wish for me that i will do better for the 2nd month and i can find myself and the place that suit me faster after i transfer to Sunway. Honestly, i duno that my decision to transfer to Sunway is correct or not but i am sure of 1 thing, that is i can learn what i want to learn at there and it is web programming!! I have been trying my best to force myself not to think abt her anymore and force myself do not interrupt her happy life now anymore.. i cant say i can do all of that perfectly but at least i can do 60-70% of it! For now, i admit that im still waiting there but i know clearly that it is no point for me to wait anymore cause something will never happen. Instead of waiting, there is something more suitable for me to do and that is wishing her to be more and more happy after this. I wonder i will be like this until when.. I really wanna to get rid of this faster but i do not know how to do that. It is hard!

Well it is already 1 month so fast, but still i need to keep going and wish that i will do better in the following day, week, month n year!! I think for all the friends know me for long time, none of them will believe i will be so loyal cause it never happen before n this is the 1st time! Do not ask me why cause myself also do not know about the reason! ahaha!!

No More 'P'!!

ahaha!! Finally i m no more 'P' driver! i already change my 'P' license this morning!!
For those who know me well, i never stick the 'P' sticker on my car although im stil a 'P' driver last time. ahaha! duno y i hate 'P' so much.
For all my friends, u all no need scare so much whn sitting in my car because im pro driver already~ ahaha. Although i drive very safe, but duno y some of my friends still say that i drive dangerously.. haiz~

Another Busy Day?

yesterday 22/07/2009, start classes at 10am in the morning. Damm lazy to go to the class cause it is BIT 103 intro to database system class which have to meet Sandy for 2 hours . But still i have to go because if i skip her class again, i will be barred for the exam! Haiz, i start my journey to HELP by 10am, purposely to be late, and reached there around 10.30am. Nothing special happen in the class as it is such a boring class.
After that, go have some food with my friends and continue the BIT 106 intro to java class by 2pm. Ron messaged me by 12pm and say that he will depart in 1pm and ask me go skol earlier because got some assignment question wanna ask me. By the time he reached, it is almost 2pm already. This is what he mean by will reach earlier...
During the class, Ron keep ask me to accompany him to go for the movie, The Proposal, which showing at 9pm at Tropicana City Mall. For sure i dont wanna go with him for the movie cause the movie is about LOVE de la! later people thought that me n him are gay! i have try my best to reject his offer but still end up i accompany him to the movie due to i kesian him have to go alone for the movie.
Actualy is worth alot for me lo cause he treat me dinner n i get to know what did MyFM cruiser normally do. It is the 1st time i go for a movie sneak peak. The movie will be release after 1 week bt i get to watch it 1 week earlier than the first showtime. MyFM cruiser gave out alot of gift before the movie and one of the gift they given out was so attractive. It is a couple necklace and i wanted it so much! ahaha!
1 more thing, i get to c Mr Teh n Mr Tian dinner at Subway at Tropicana City Mall during Ron give out the ticket to the winner. ahaha! too bad i did not go HI with them... I also get to know who is Ron ex ex gf! ahaha!! some funny thing happen in the cinema when the movie was showing~
hmm.. today i go out since early in the morning, which is 10am, and when i reach home it is almost 12am liao.. 14 hour hang at outside make me really tired n feel like going to sick soon cause started to having flu. After bath still have to finish up my Java assignment because have to pass up the next day. after finishing all the stuff, it is already 1am+ liao.. haiz~

A busy Day

18 July 2009

Today is a saturday. Hmm before this, i wanted to wish my friend, kiki because today is her birdthday! Happy birthday kiki! ahaha..

Today 9am-2pm got replacement class for BIT 106 Introduction to Java. i only managed to wake myself up by 8.30am and after prepared all the things, it was after 9am only. i reach school there by 9.30am due to the traffic jam! i tot im late enough for the class, who know there is someone more late than me! who else? Ron la! He enter the class only by 11am! deng! He so yeng la~ Not only that, Mr Kok give us 15 minutes break after halfway of the class. Me, Ron n Aaron went to secret recipe to eat cake n go starbuck for coffee, lol. Instead of 15 minutes, we 3 use nearly 1 hour i think to hang outside only then enter the class!

I wonder why Ron like to touch me! He feel so gay to me bt not for Aaron! Why?!! Is it because i look gay? NO!! Im not gay OK!! Ron, please let me go.. i beg u.. He keep wanted to hold my hand! Ishh! so disgusting! Anyway, although he is gay for me, bt still he is a nice friend!

We went to the cinema for Ice Age 3 after the class! Yeah! Finally i watched Ice Age 3! It was damm funny la! Some scene of Ice Age 3 make me feel like im watching chocolate advertisement ==.

After movie, we went to Dragon-i at 1U to have their lunch, my breakfast, lol! It is the 1st time i enter Dragon-i, so pity myself, haiz~ i wanted to try the pig shape bun so much but end up i did not ordered it. haiz~ now so regret. Ron paid for all the bill for movie n lunch at Dragon-i cause he is dai lou ma. ahaha thx for the treat le~ Actually have to pay back him de but since he forget already thn just diam diam lo, lol! Hope he will not see this la~

After that, we started our journey to Bon Odori from 1U. It is the 1st time also for me to go to the Bon Odori. Three of us also duno how to go there, luckily Ron know how to see the map! He even told me that by knowing how to see map can easily kao lui! AHAHA! lmao! It is so hard to find parking there. After go around that place for few times, then only i manage to find a parking slot.. It was so crowded there! A lot girls wearing kimono to there! Lenglui n lengzai! wahahaha! see till u drop, lol. Here is something weird. After Ron reach Bon Odori there, he wanted to find his friend and it is the 1st time he ask me n Aaron go walk ourself 1st later only gather back. I wonder he do not want to let us see who. It is his ex i think. After that he look like so down but we do not know what happen to him. Maybe is because of his ex ba~ Cheer up dude!

We leave that place around 9pm i think. During the way back home, we take wrong way and wasted alot of time! ahaha! I only managed to reach home after 11pm.. Today can say i out for one whole day and it is so tired but still i only fall sleep by 4am. ahaha! something wrong with me i guess.. and 1 meal again for me today...

3rd week

it is already 3rd week since that day. Time passing so fast! A lot of things have been different already.
But im stil the same. Duno why. I know that now I, myself mean nothing to her already yet i still miss her alot. ahaha. Really duno what had happened to me. I did try alot of methods to let myself forget about her. No matter what i did, my mind still will thinking about her. This is 1st time in my life that i cant forget a gal after break up for 3 weeks! am i changing? is it good or bad? no one know...
One thing for sure, i did changed alot because of her. I still remember that before i met her, rude words seem to be very common come out from my mouth! ahaha. She did told me that she dont like people scold rude words or even curse people n i really did changed to the way she want! This is good!
As u can c, i still did think about her. Nowaday, i have been trying to make myself busy so that i will not think about her so often. Luckily, i have to pass up alot of assignment this few weeks so i got something to busy with! What i worry is, after all the assignment have been submit, then what else can make me busy?
HAIZ!!!!

Happy OR Sad??

today is quite complicated for me. yesterday i got try to date her n she did not gimme any accurate answer and i jz take it as a joke from her. today noon i received her msg to go for movie n i feeled vry happy coz is is imposible for it to happen again. although that time im eating with group of my friends, i just told them i got something urgent n need to leave.
At last after two week plus, i manage to date her out again! At last after two week plus, i can talk with her face to face! deep inside my heart i feel very happy.
BUT i can feel that something is difference. the way she treat me, the way she talk to me, all diffenrent from the past. i think it is all because that she already put down me. At the same time, i feel saddd deep inside my heart.
what happen to me? ahaha.. i also duno.
after going back home, i force myself to ask her all the question in my mind. i was hoping for a positive answer but ends up all negative answer was given to me. ahaha. reali feel very sad. Why am i so stupid? Stupid because i still think that i still got chance but in reality i do not have any chances!
I have been try to lie to myself that i dun miss her anymore. i thought that time can help me forget her slowly bt as time pass on i found that i miss her more n more! How come it will be like this?!!
IM STUPID ENOUGH FOR NOT APPRECIATE HER UNTIL THE TIME SHE GONE!!!
REALY HATE MYSELF A LOT!

金牛座

金牛座和羊兒還蠻能和平相處，
牛牛和牛牛容易互相不爽，
和雙子成為好友的機率很大，
和巨蟹座則是有如家人一樣彼此照顧！
而牛牛和獅子可以說是死對頭，
和處女則是天生絕配，
和天秤是相當的對眼。
至於牛牛與天蠍間有著致命的吸引力，
與射手互相欣賞，
和摩羯志同道合，
和水瓶互相不滿，
和雙魚則是超級好朋友。

quite accurate de! for me la~

Again one Special Day

ahaha! today morning i skipped class again! second time for BIT 103 intro to database! sei lo~
hmm i feel vry bad actualy.. although i got went for the BIT 106 intro to Java class bt what i did in the class reali make me feel so bad. i kept fooling around with my other 2 friends in the class, did not reali concentrate on what Mr Kok teach.
Guess what? after the class i went to Low Yat Plaza with Ron and Aaron! Gosh! duno y i will follow Ron to go there! Ron wanted to go there jz to buy some skin product n he planned that after that we go to sing K at Red Box. Walao! sing K at night time wo! sure vry expensive la.. i tot i will be bankrupt after today but i was realy lucky! there was such an offer package for student to sing K at night time. It only cost RM17++ per head for student at night time! it include 2 drinks n buffet too! Nothing more to worry about, thus we just go in to the room and started our singing n eating section! It was very nice although it is 1st time for me to sing K with 2 "mat lat lou"! ahaha! hope they 2 will not see this~ =P
We sing from 6pm++ until 10pm++ and i think RM17 per head is worth it! I enjoy alot tonight and i hope that they 2 also feel that same as me la~ my 1st time experience for sing K at night time has been given to Ron n Aaron! =( sad!
Ron~ i will not say out what u trying to do to me today! ahaha! only u, me n Aaron know what u did! i treat u so good~ u know wat to do la~ XD
It is 11pm++ when i reached home. Tired! bt duno y i dun feel like sleeping so early. Haiz maybe in my mind there is something stil goin on and on. I wonder how to put aside the feeling of missing someone.

愛情不是選擇一個最好的，而是選最適合你的人.
** love is not choose the best one, love is choose the one that suit u most! **
it is quite meaningfull n i like it! ahaha. just to share with all my friends!

Random

nowaday i feel that i got alot of free time.. especially next week cause all my classes has been cancel due to all the lecturer need to go for training. haiz how should i spend my one week free time le? or should i say how would my next week life be? will it be interesting? boring? anyone to date with me? =D

i dun wan stay in the house for 1 whole week! i gonna die soon because of boredom!
Oops! few assignment need to pass up next week bt i still not yet start working on it! ahaha!

hmm.. my life started to return to the old way. started to adapt to the day without her although i stil miss her so much! Well, at least now i know that she is happier than before and i should not go into her life anymore. i think this is good for me n her and the last thing i can do for her. Hope she will be happy forever. now im waiting for the time to come as im tired alrdy. waiting for the time to come and then i will keep the love for her deep inside my heart.

to all my friends~
if any of u need someone to accompany, u can find me! cause im available for next week whole week! n i need someone to accompany me too! ahaha!

Meeting Old Friends

5th July 2009
today is quite a nice day for me. after plan for one night, i manage to date some of my old friends to come out for a gathering.
after fetching Seng Yong aka Boon and Cmin, we go to a new cafe at Selayang Jaya there to meet with PhongYue and her gf. We do have a nice chatting time there. Too bad some of them cant make it cause they are busy with own stuff. We hang at there from around 5 until 7pm. The time was passing so fast!
After Yap reach there with his "little friend", we went to the Stadt, a German Steak House in Metroprima to have our dinner together. Cmin's friend and Nick joined us at the dinner too. Happy to see so many of my friends gather together although the food there is damm expensive! However, it happen to be a very nice dinner for me because throughout the dinner we manage to make fun out of each others. Today is a special day for SengYong i think because he finally dare to ask for a gal's phone number in front of us! What a good start for him, ahaha!!
Other than that, i also learned some gossip from my friends too. Nick! Do u thought as as ur friends? Is this how u treat ur FRIENDS? sei hamsap kia! bought souvenier for gals bt nothing for us la! Still dare to ask me fetch u back home!! ahaha! joking nia! Hope u wont c this...

1 WEEK PAST

it is already 1 week past after what happen to me last friday..
time has pass so fast for me suddenly. i also duno how did i pass this 7 days! everyday everytime every seconds i also feel that something has been missing. i had been waiting my phone to ring everyday n hope that i can c the phone showing her name! some of my friends also ask me y am i so stupid...
everyday i also wonder i will continue like this until when. i had been trying hard in the past few days to forget her bt stil i cant make it. why??? Why did i stil miss her so much??
after having some chat with my friends who had been experienced this before, i think i found the answer. i know the reason for me to become like this and it reali need some times for me to recover. gambateh for me and everyone out there that is experiencing the same as me!

Guilty

haiz! i feel guilty for skipping my 2 lecture classes!
2/7/09 (Thursday)- i skipped BIT 103 Introduction to Database lecture class because i wanted to go lepak at One Utama so that i can put aside what matter me the most for the past few days.
i thought that i was the only one that did not went to the class.
today whn i went to school only i realise that Sheng Loong also skipped her class coz her class is damm boring!
3/7/09 (Friday) - actualy today my claz start at 9am n i manage to wake up by 8am. Due to my laziness n moodyness, i decide to skip BIT 101 Introduction to Information Technology lecture class too. so i went to continue my slp! ahaha! luckily i still got went to school in the afternoon for a tutorial class. however that class is suck for me! the lecturer make me wanna vomit! i hope she will not make up anymore after today class. if not i reali duno how to concentrate during her class!
haiz~ duno y nowaday i got no mood to study. feel like i lost interest to everything include my favourite video games and movie and etc. the most terible part is i only have 1 meal in 1 day! i reali wonder what had happen to me! i knw that is bad for health bt stil i dont have appetite to eat. haiz~ duno who can help me out with this? i gonna crazy soon~

thx to all my fren

today is my first time to "pak toh" with a GUY! AHAHA! i also cant believe it! My gay partner name is Ron! if u wan to view his pic, jz inform me. I will give u a link to his profile at facebook! ahaha! Due to he is half public person, so i cant reali show his pic to u all! This is wat he tell me la~ paiseh ><seriously, i reali thanks him so much for accompany me whole day cause he know im stil feeling sad about what happen last friday. Our dating started with a lunch at Little Taiwan. After that, we go for a movie - The Last House on The Left. the movie stil ok for me la. feel a bit weird coz 1st time i watch movie with a guy!! after movie, we stil hang around at 1U for 1 hour + ! It is a special date for me.

other than that, i also thx to yap n minyee who acc me to sing k last sunday although the bill is paid by me! >< i hav a nice day with u two. Remember do not tell others what is happening in the k room! if not i got no face to meet others liao!

not only that, i also wanted to thx neo for fetching me out last saturday for a movie at 1U. cause if i drove myself that day, i can imagine how dangerous it will be!! thx to nick for buying the ticket also cause he queue up for 2 hours jz to bought the tickets! thx to lau, shimin n karyan too for their presence during last saturday.

of course i will not 4got my big sister, Chuee Leng jie! ahaha! thx u for ur willingness to listen to me and try to comfort me although it is not success. thx for ahpo aka wivian for listen to me too!
thx to aaron law for trying to comfort me too!

Special thx to minyee again and Ching Yee although she is not vry close with me. Both of them trying to help me to rescue back the relationship. thx for their effort for helping me! reali appreciate what u two did although the relationship has become a memory for me.

With all my friends by myside, i think i will recover sooner. Reali thx for wat u all did. Reali! Without u all i think i m dead now!

Finally, thx Ron for the Chocolate! ahaha. i feel so wasted to eat the chocolate la~ i will try to keep it as long as i can! thx all my friends n i love u all~

For all those cant accompany me bt still my fren, i also appreciate u all too. Each of my friends also did bring me happiness before. U all make my life different by becoming better n better! Of course i still need a gf by my side de la!

One more thing, RON! im not gonna be a gay! i still love girls! ahaha. Anyway, thx for wat u trying to do today! Hope u c this!

Fallen Deep Down

Have been long time i did not have such feeling. After the incidents happen last friday (26 June 09), my life change from a happy life to a meaningless life. I think most of my friends will feel surprise that i also will have a so call saddish side.
Here is the story~
26 june 2009, it is a friday but it is not a normal one, for me. I continue my life as usual as i need to go to school in the morning. i did everything same as what i did at every friday of the past few weeks after school started. I just finished my 2nd class of that day by 12pm. As usual, i take out my phone n start to message my gf. Everything look vry normal on that day and i cant feel any danger sense. My gf told me she will be going out with her college friends tat afternoon. It is very normal for her to go out with her friends once a time. So i also did not think much about that. i continues my class until 5.30pm and i drove home straight away.
Since my gf was out, i use the free time to do my own stuff while waiting her. Oh Shit! I left my pendrive at school! few assignment was inside the pendrive! and i have to redo again jz bcoz of my carelessness. After some time, it was 9pm alrdy n she stil nt yt reach home. It is so unusual! i started to feel the danger sense since then. So i started to message her and even call her phone bt no respond was given. I started to worry and finally she reply my msg after few hours if i not mistaken. After few message was replied by her, so SUDDENLY i receive a message from her that she wanted to break up with me! IT ALL HAPPEN SO SUDDENLY. How am i suppose to react? AHAHA im crazy since that seconds onwards!
maybe u will wonder abt the reason she want to break with me, but due to some privacy so it is not so good to be posted at public.
Tell me if it is u, what will you do? how will u feel? how u going to face it?
I lost everything in just one day!